Does anybody really know what time it is?

I'm not referring to the clock on the wall

It's time for school
It's time for bed
It's time for dinner
It's time for high school
It's time to go to college
It's time to get a job
It's time to get married
It's time to have kids
It's time to have grandkids
It's time to retire
It's time to have great-grandkids
It's time to pass on

When is our time? When will it happen? When is it my turn?

Questions I have been struggling with the past month or so during some life changing moments in my personal life. Questions I have been putting before God even though I know everything always happens in HIS time, not my own.

Once in a while, He answers. Maybe I was persistent enough, or maybe He realized that there was too much on me and I needed a lift. He answered in the form of a dream the other night. I don't know about others, but a lot of the time, I can remember my dreams very vividly as is the case with this one. Just an ordinary dream about some tall, good looking, blond guy. A guy who, in the dream was interested in me, and visa versa. At the end, however, I woke up with such a feeling of reassurance that my time was coming, that I haven't been able to shake it or worry it away even 3 days later. (this is a big deal for me! LOL) I know that people tell me that all the time, and I tell myself and I pray about it...but none of that calmed me as much as this dream. I believe that in some way, God was responsible (as He always is) and it was His way of helping me through some rough waters. I am so thankful that He works in my life and guides me and I rejoice that He is always with me even during these harder times, even when I need obvious signs...*L* I am eternally grateful to the people He has put in my life whether they are near or far, they are irreplacable and have been there for me and my family.

5 Interesting things about me

Ok.....so I'm posting 2 in one day...sue me. Jen tagged me on Friday, but I was in such a bad mood, I honestly couldn't think of 5 things. Still not sure I can...but here goes:

1......I love to play volleyball. I started playing in high school and I absolutely love it. I would play every day if I could. It's one sport I'm actually kinda good at. I now coach middle school volleyball and we are having a blast!

2.....I am on a CD. A real CD! When I was in college I played handbells with the Alleluia Ringers, a touring handbell group. We also recorded several CDs while I was a part of the group. I would have stayed in college indefinitely if I could keep playing handbells.

3.....In 2006 I walked the 3 day walk for Breast Cancer. I didn't prepare for it nearly as much as I should have, and in the end, being at least 100+ lbs overweight, I finished about 42 of the 60 miles! I was extremely happy about that! It was one of the most incredible and moving experiences I have ever been through and for a wonderful cause.

4.....I can say thank you in 8 different languages: English, American Sign Language, Spanish, German, French, Italian, Russian and Japanese. No matter where I am, I can always be polite! lol Maybe not in the interesting category, but quirky...lol

5.....I collect Japanese tea cups. I don't have many, they are not easy to find. Mostly going to thrift stores, etc I find them. So, if anyone knows a good place to get them...let me know!

Good weekend

I got to get away and see some friends this weekend...friends I haven't seen in a long time. One of them had a small halloween party on Saturday night and my friend Lori and I decided to dress up! Of course, no one else dressed up, but I don't care, I love wearing costumes..lol and the kids thought it was great! After a while we changed so we wouldn't be so conspicuous, but it was still fun.

Can we say snacker?

Oh My Goodness. I can't believe my own carelessness. I have snacked so much this week. I have also never been so stressed and frustrated and dealing with so much drama. This past month has been a month of challenges emotionally and it's showing on the scale and what I'm putting in my mouth. I just feel so tired and lousy today, I just don't care, I didn't even want to try.

I joined a group of walkers, so I did get some walking in the week...4.5 miles.

I've lost and kept off 20 pounds. I have at least another 100 or more. It is NOT time to quit!! At the same time, I am not sure what it's going to take to get me going and learn to get over the stress and do what needs to be done anyway. I don't want to ruin the progress I've made so far.

I forgot to post that I gained 4 lbs this week..but maybe you guessed that...

Around the corner...

Around the corner...

.....another Monday and another start to the work week. Another week with my new student. he keeps me on my toes and I pray that I can keep my patience and help him.

.....a new life...a life without my love. A boyfriend who says he realizes he is totally in love with me, but can't imagine trying to make a life with me work. There are a few other things in his life that are more important than me and doesn't think he can get his master's degree or publish his book while trying to be with me. It's just too hard for him...and very confusing for me. We are separated for now and if it works, it works.

.....a new beginning...starting on the road to walking in the 3 day walk for breast cancer. I am still at least 100 lbs overweight and I have a long road ahead of me. I am not happy with who I am and what I do, and I am starting again to get back to the person I know I am and the person I know I can be.

.....a trip out of town! I am excited about this, I really need to get out and see some friends that I haven't seen in a while and I can't wait! Plus, there is going to be a Halloween party, so I get to dress up!

.....making some decisions about where I'm going to live and if I can afford to get a house or not, or if I want to move away from my family or stay near them.

Staying the same

The scale didn't move this week. To be honest, I'm happy about that.

The last several weeks have not been the best for me. A lot of emotional stuff going on, problems in my love life, my family, stress at work, etc.

I'm tired of feeling like that all the time and I'm ready to get back and focus on becoming healthier and becoming a better me. I want to concentrate on doing some indoor workouts, cardio and strength, because the weather is starting to turn colder and I don't want to get in the trap of being less active now that summer has gone. Volleyball is going to wrap up in a few weeks and I need to find a way to get back into what I need to do - eating better and getting activity.

I have also decided that I'm going to walk in the 3 day walk for Breast cancer next August. I walked it in '06 and it was an incredible experience, one that I will never forget. Last time I walked 42 of the 60 miles. Next time, I want to make it all 60 miles. This will only happen if I can shed some much hated pounds and walk, walk, walk. I have a lot of time to work for it, and I am making it my goal to do it.

unsettled

I'm not sure why...maybe because of the craziness of the last week or so. I've had enough drama to last me a long time. Right now, I feel very unsettled.

I have a new student and he is definitely keeping me on my toes. I think we may have a touch of attention problems, as well as some oppositional defiance problems. It's been an interesting week trying to stay at least one step ahead of him and not turn my whole class upside down. Luckily, I've had the other boys for several weeks now and they are used to my routine and don't follow his lead too much.

I could also use some chocolate right about now....

How did this happen?

Somehow, I managed to lose 3 lbs this week. I stepped on the scale this morning and it read 251! I've been having a lot of drama going on this week and really haven't felt like eating great amounts and with a bit more water consumption, I managed to let some weight get away from me :) I hope that things are going to start calming down and get back to walking and activity.